I drew two cards yesterday as part of my Daily Readings ritual with my SoulCollage^® Deck.  I wasn’t specifically asking for guidance in the New Year, but look what wisdom I unveiled!

NOT ENOUGH

I am the one who was led to believe I wasn’t enough.

Not pretty enough, not smart enough, not good enough, not sexy enough, not loving enough. 

I am the one who was locked into that belief for many, many years.

I am the one who hid for decades behind masks.

I am the one who felt so ashamed all the time. 

My message for you today is this- please take care of me. 

Remind me that I AM enough. Shelter me.  Hold me.  Feed me with joy and with present moment awareness of Source.  My energy no longer serves you.  Remember that.  Don’t let me start believing the old stories again.

So I was a little annoyed at first because I drew such a DARK card to start of my New Year.

But…. look at what I drew for my second card:

METAMORPHOSIS

I am the one who is bursting forth into butterfly beauty. 

I am the one who is transforming into my truest divine nature. 

I am the one who shatters the beliefs and lessons of the past. 

I am the one sailing, flying, on a sea of jeweled green heart-growth. 

I am the one who smiles, looking inward.

I am the one who is leaving behind the musty coccoon. 

I am the one who is unfolding my wings, leaving the past behind.

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I’ve been getting back into the habit of daily (ok, ALMOST daily) SoulCollage^® readings with my cards. Just a few minutes in the morning, sometimes longer.  I’m really enjoying the gift this practice has of centering me and connecting me back to my wisest, clearest Self.

Today, I drew these two cards:

I Can Do It Myself- Committee Suit-

I am the one who is bent under the weight of this over-full tray I am holding.  I am the one who is gripping onto the try tightly.  I am the one who thinks I have to do this by myself. I am the one who is doing this alone come hell or high water.

My message for you today is this: I am tired of carrying this heavy tray all by myself.  Please help me?  I have been taught that I have to do all of the hard stuff alone.  But is that really true?  Can you please, please help me???

Yes, I will help you, dear one.

Thank you for trying to carry all of my burdens for so long.  It’s time to set down the tray. There are others on our team who will help us to carry what needs to be carried.

Thank you!  It is really hard-wired inside of me, this thing about having to do it all myself and all the time, you know? I just need some help in breaking that hard-wiring.  I just need your patience, and I need you to help me to make different choices so I can understand, really understand, that I am not alone.

Buddha/curtains (Keys to Joy suit)-

I am the one who is sitting alone in the light-filled window, only curtains stirred by the breeze.  I am the one who is sitting still and quietly and trusting that I don’t have to DO anything to be loved and held in love by Spirit.  I am the one who is meditating, praying, still.  I am the one who is at home in my body.

I am the one who is at peace with myself.  My message for you today is this- sit still, now.  You are almost done with your journal entry for today, yes?  Go in your Quiet Room and sit on the chair with your prayer shawl and close your eyes.  Be still. Let go of everything that you have been struggling to carry.  Let the world go on without your struggle, your insistence on doing, doing, doing.

And while writing about them, I looked at them side by side and saw such amazing similarities and differences, that I really had a wonderful “inner surprise!”

I was drawn to how similar the cards are in color and tone… the grays and whites, the neutral tones, the almost blandness of each of them.  But the huge difference is the energy in each one. The first card seemed to be showing me the energy that’s been controlling me these past several months, and what I receive from the second card is the energy that I would like to invite more of into my life!

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